This is a continuation of the post I did on Lala Anthony's "5th and Mercer". My IG is out of commission (or either I have no clue what I'm doing, lol) so I decided to try to reach you all here.
Honestly, I don't even know where to begin. I suppose I should start from the very beginning, huh?
One night, I was bored and scrolling through Twitter, reading everyone's posts. I saw Lala post a photo of a pair of HOT tuxedo stripe trousers from her new clothing line! I got all excited because I had been waiting FOREVER to get something from that collection. So, I clicked the link and went over to the site. All of a sudden, this cobalt blue skirt started speaking to me. There was only 1 skirt left, and 1 size left. It was an 8. I added it to my cart just for safekeeping (while I think about it). In the meantime, Lala had replied to one of my tweets, suggesting the same skirt I had my eyes on. When I told her that I didn't wear a size 8, she mentioned it had a lot of stretch. And for any plus size girl, (well, for ME)...that's like the MAGIC WORD! lol So, I went back to my cart, pondered a bit more, then realized that I could use the skirt as my "measuring tape" so to speak. I don't know about you, but I like giving myself an incentive (that I can see and touch) as a reward for my hard work. Kinda like a Vision Board..in HD.lol I had just signed up with a trainer last week and thought the fitness and health God's had sent me to Twitter, which in turn sent me to ShopBop, and ULTIMATELY led me to writing this post.
Yesterday, the skirt arrived! I was so HAPPY to get it and try it on and play around with it. Yes, I'm a grown woman who LOOOVES playing dress up! I grabbed a few things from my closet and did 2 different looks. (FYI: I post photos on IG of all my thrifted, bargain, and just things I'm excited about outfits.lol) I wanted to show my fellow IG'er the AMAZING skirt, as well as give them an ideas on how it can be styled. I know the 1st thing comes to mind when people mention "pencil skirt"...they think "conservative", "dressy", or maybe "clubwear". I wanted to exhibit a different take on it. Ya'll know how I like to go against the grain.lol So, I'm all giddy like a little kid on Christmas, right?? After trying on the skirt, I posted the photos (BELOW) to my IG and tagged Lala in it. OH EM GEE! WHY DID I DO THAT?? In my head, I'm thinking, "my IG'er's are gonna buy her out of these skirts!" Well, I was only thinking of MY 600 IG friends. I didn't think Lala was going to repost the pic. She did! Someone contacted me on FB and told me she had done it. I felt so proud that she posted a chunky girl like me on her page! I go over to her page to see it. AND LOW AND BEHOLD....the fat bashers were in full effect! I saw about 4 or 5 rude comments about my weight and stomach. Don't get me wrong...I did look bout 5 months pregnant! lol But I'm not. That's what some size 14 girls look like. I remember one saying "I hope she's pregnant!", and one saying "it fits like a glove because it's 6 sizes too small." I tried to politely, respond to them all...but they were coming TOO FAST...I just gave up. I mean, what good would it have done anyway? I actually, laughed with them. I'm aware of my weight and aware of my body. And if I choose to wear something, why would it bother them so??? There were many nice comments made, and that's what I focused on. I don't participate in anything that wouldn't add to the quality of my life, or the quality of life of others. What's the point??
This portion took me the longest to type because I couldn't stop crying. I couldn't stop crying because I *Awwww SHIT here it comes again* I couldn't stop crying because I was/am SO OVERWHELMED with GRATITUDE for what Lala Anthony and the other AMAZING WOMEN (and men) did and said! Lala removed the targeted photo and reposted this photo with a message (BELOW). She could have EASILY left the photo up. She could've EASILY, just taken it down. The fact that she reposted a photo with the most ENCOURAGING message just melted my heart! I already loved her for being such an AMAZING businesswoman and mother. But I now I admire her for her HEART! She didn't have to do that! She could've easily turned the other way, and SHE DIDN'T! The same to the other ladies and guys! You all didn't have to speak up against what was going on. AND YOU DID! You all exemplified everything this whole world SHOULD BE! The compassion and thoughtfulness just BLEW ME AWAY! *Awwww heyolllllll...tears* I think all of us Pisces are too emotional.lol
I see what happened to me occur on a daily basis. Each time I try to speak up with hopes that 1 person would learn to taste their words before they speak/type them. I will NEVER know nor understand what drives people to be so cruel and mean to someone who's done ZERO harm to them. We are ALL HUMAN! We ALL HAVE FLAWS whether you choose to believe that, it's on you. However, I'm happy being me, I'm comfortable being me, and each day I wake up, I thank God for making the way he did. FLAWS AND ALL! My heart is forgiving, my love is GENUINE, and I ALWAYS try to see the cup "half full". Life is for LIVING, not BASHING one another. I could've taken it down the wrong route, but I CHOSE not to delve into something not worth delving into. EVERYDAY, I choose to be better than I was the day before. By NO MEANS, I am NOWHERE NEAR perfect! I have buttons, and sometimes they get pushed...and I react irrationally sometimes. Fortunately, those I love holds the map to those buttons.lol
Thank you all from the bottom pit of my jello-ish belly! lol I really, TRULY APPRECIATE ALL THE LOVE AND KIND WORDS YOU'VE LEFT ON MY PAGE! You HONESTLY, have NO IDEA! I try to indulge in positivity, I promote LOVING YOURSELF and ENCOURAGE LIVING and LAUGHING OUT LOUD! Through this, I hope Lala, and the thousands of you other positive people touch someone else's heart the way you have forever touched mine!
Still I Rise
by Maya Angelou
You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.
Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.
Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.
Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?
Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own backyard.
You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.
Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?
Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.
